Skip to main content

Hebrews 11:1

"I heard a word saying girl you'll be fine. I heard a word that would ease my troubled mind" -Heard A Word : Michelle Williams

Whole bunch going on in my head. So much noise I cant really hear you. You know the last time my mind was crystal clear I was doing stuff I don't do no more. Everything just got super complicated out of no where. Or maybe I just started doing stuff because other people thought it was important. Either way it goes im not sure if im moving forward or at a stand still. That's so dangerous. I know you can and will protect my mind. And I can honestly say I need that right now. I feel sufocated just sitting here unsure about everything. Well not everything. Im sure about you and one other thing. Its just funny how when I became sure he wasnt no more. Then it turned into oh maybe I should do this first and that first. And its making me think I should have kept it moving. Maybe I meditate on it way too much. Its super frustrating for me to make a change for the best and then find out in reality Im by myself. Its hard to let your gaurd down when the people you let in run through it and go ham. Then I havent even talked to you or nobody else about none of this. My expectation seem to be super high. I feel like i reliving my past in certain areas. Everything just seem so familar. Thats why im so ready to leave. I have to be able to rely nobody else but Jesus at some point. And the people closet to me dont like it. Everything I should be doing by myself they are so against for some odd reason. Im a very good child. I know my place. I try my best to stay in it. But im ready to own or rent something. I know you created me to be something wonderful. Something the world will never see unless I become it. Before I came here I had a purpose. Living out my past is pretty boring you know. I write it out to everybody else. But I never thought I would find myself writing to you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Unashamed

"I'm not saying its all holy. This music reflects my walk. I'm a saint with a past who by the grace of God has a future." - HyQuality Whew! I haven't done one of these in a while. I use to write these in my unsaved days. Always about everybody but the Creator. Not this time. This one is dedicated to the love of my life. The man who keeps me who comforts me who wipes every tear from my eyes. The man who protects me day and night who waited for me to come home who is not a ashamed of me even when I'm ashamed of myself. The man who is King of all Kings the source of my resources. Jesus Christ. Redemption: Tape 1 Side A Chasing Pavements - Adele I was having the time of my life. I figured cause I wasn't drinking smoking or having sex I was surely going to heaven. I had sins of my own but nobody is perfect. In my mind a curse word here and there was okay and a few when you get man was natural. Somebody even told me they cursed in the Bible and who can argue wit...

Snapshots

Picture This Walking without a set destination. Wondering when my left and right switched positions causing me to go backwards. Hoping I would trip upon my future and land inside His will. Not sure if he still feels the same. He loves me He loves me not. Or maybe I don't love Him. Picture This A young lady fighting to hold on to what she knows. Not willing to give in to her past. Scared that she will disappoint those if they really knew the picture that sin snapped of her. Hoping they would believe for themselves but knowing the cross is heavy. Lord you said your burden is light and your yoke is easy. So why do I feel so heavy? Picture This Love blossoming like beautiful roses in a stone garden. Seperated but holding on tighter than ever before. Beautiful things come from hard places. Walking around several times doesn't always mean the walls fall down. Crazy things happen when you let Egypt conquer Judah. These jeans would fit better if I knew who I was. Picture This It...

Embrace Me

"Chest to chest. Nose to nose. Palm to palm. We were just that close. Wrist to wrist. Toe to toe.....So how come when I reach out my finger it feels like more than distance between us." - California King Bed: Rihanna Chest to chest The simplest of friendships start with the warmness of a hug. The closest that two hearts can be and still beat. Love has a language of its own. One you can only become fluent in through a relationship with Christ. But hugs are different. The embrace of open arms that only close when you come inside caused my first accident. I smashed into you and became paralyzed from the waist down. You picked me up vowing to never let me fall. Palm to palm We never interlocked fingers. We simply held hands. Conversations overlapping future speeches. Wisdom flying at the speed of light with no cops to pull us over. Hand shakes quickly turned into high fives as the intimacy reduced to seconds. Never hungry enough to eat the entire plate. From refrigerator to trash...