Skip to main content

Hebrews 11:1

"I heard a word saying girl you'll be fine. I heard a word that would ease my troubled mind" -Heard A Word : Michelle Williams

Whole bunch going on in my head. So much noise I cant really hear you. You know the last time my mind was crystal clear I was doing stuff I don't do no more. Everything just got super complicated out of no where. Or maybe I just started doing stuff because other people thought it was important. Either way it goes im not sure if im moving forward or at a stand still. That's so dangerous. I know you can and will protect my mind. And I can honestly say I need that right now. I feel sufocated just sitting here unsure about everything. Well not everything. Im sure about you and one other thing. Its just funny how when I became sure he wasnt no more. Then it turned into oh maybe I should do this first and that first. And its making me think I should have kept it moving. Maybe I meditate on it way too much. Its super frustrating for me to make a change for the best and then find out in reality Im by myself. Its hard to let your gaurd down when the people you let in run through it and go ham. Then I havent even talked to you or nobody else about none of this. My expectation seem to be super high. I feel like i reliving my past in certain areas. Everything just seem so familar. Thats why im so ready to leave. I have to be able to rely nobody else but Jesus at some point. And the people closet to me dont like it. Everything I should be doing by myself they are so against for some odd reason. Im a very good child. I know my place. I try my best to stay in it. But im ready to own or rent something. I know you created me to be something wonderful. Something the world will never see unless I become it. Before I came here I had a purpose. Living out my past is pretty boring you know. I write it out to everybody else. But I never thought I would find myself writing to you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Next Stop: Liberty

So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. - John 8:36 "It is the hurt that breaks me it’s the pain that pulls me to my knees and the tears they’ve changed me til what I couldn’t see Becomes so clear to me This is the way The way that you love me" - Anthony Evans Where do I begin? Its been a long 2 months. I went through every emotion there is. I cried more than I slept and prayed more than I breathed. I was isolated from every single comfort zone I faithfully rested my head upon. All I had was a mouth to pray and hands to praise. It was just me and God. And though I know He would never leave nor forsake me I had never felt so alone. I felt abandoned and cut off. The dreams I had grown so accustomed to were no where to be found. The very gift through which all my answered prayer came was out of service. I felt like my prayer was in vain. I started to focus my mind on other things. I begin to rely on people back home to tell me what God was saying. I patiently...

Challenge Accepted: My Scars

A couple days ago a fellow blogger and sister of mine issued a challenge. The challenge was to write a blog on why I show my scars. Once I read the challenge I knew I had to participate. Sharing my journey through writing has been a source of healing and freedom not just for me but for those who read the blog. Ever since I started this blog I have had the support of Rhachelle and I am truly grateful for that. When I bought my first pink my scars tee from her RN brand t-shirt collection I promised myself I wouldn't put it on until I was ready to speak freely about everything I had been through. Needless to say the shirt is in heavy rotation and I can no longer be silent about how Christ rescued me. I hope that you all enjoy this post and decide to take the challenge as well. Check out rhachellenicol.com for more information on the challenge and rnbranddesign.bigcartel.com for the my scars t-shirts and her other ministry tees.  I show my scars because I was never good at putting o...

He Gave

And he gave me hands. Hands to write the vision and make it plain. Hands to wipe every tear as He counted the blessings they would bring. He gave me feet. Feet to walk in the path he set before me. To run this race and endure all that comes my way. To jump over and walk through the valley of the shadow of death. He gave me a mouth. To shout the praises of a living king. To worship the glory of the holy lamb. To move the mountains to new places. To conquer the spirit of silence. He gave me life. Became who I am so I could be who he is. Laid down so I could stand firm. Cried out so I could dream big. Stepped down so I could be set free. Broke chains so I could serve him. Passed down the letter and canceled it through grace. He gave me love. Love to overcome breakthrough. To nurture bring life and survive. To rebuke loneliness inspire and grow. My King My Saviour My Redeemer who is patient and kind. Keeps no records of my wrongs wont delight in my evil ways protects trusts and...