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Lets Get High(er)

Smoking : to dream that you are smoking indicates that you are trying to shield yourself and others against your emotions. You have trouble letting others in. [from dreammoods.com dream dictionary]

Purification comes through two vessels. Education and correction. - Type.Classy

I wake up with the taste of ashes and unclean air in my mouth. Like I myself had lit one up inhaled to hard and choked. It was so real to me. I picked up one and it immediately burned to ashes and from those ashes another grew. It was the second time. I usually don't have the same dream twice but lately these two have been popping up. Same story different people/objects and a new setting. What is this trying to tell me. What is He yelling at me to prepare for.

In the back of your mind you always have answers. The one furthest back is usually the complete truth. The one you avoid in the light but cant run away from fast enough in the dark. You have no choice but to accept and consider in your sleep. So my mind begins to wonder in all directions. The first stop : the last part.

I meditate on the last part. "you have trouble letting others in." It speaks at me but not to me. Who are you and why are you knocking on my door this late at night? Interrupting my sleep but not waking me up. How dare you come to me engaging my senses without my consent. I have let too many people inside to get put outside and end up homeless. Who else needs to be here that isn't here already.

Ive been praying and fighting a lot about building a strong support system. One that is built on the rock that no force of nature can break apart. Cause the one I have now would crack if the wind blew and crumble if it rain too hard. I cant afford to wait in FEMA when it breaks. They wont rescue me fast enough.

So I spoke with a lovely anointed lady about this revelation. She suggested I consider it could be for somebody close to me. This person has always been considered very quite no matter the surroundings. Wont speak unless spoken too and stands firmly on being a gardener with no help from the rain or the sunshine. She says maybe the dream is for the gardener. How can the gardener have a hard time letting help in when that's how you produce fruit. After all we all need water and light to grow as I have been taught.

Then my mind takes a long hard look in the mirror. Who are you afraid of. Who don't you want to get too close. Who haven't you given your all to. Who have you kept your emotions away from. Who should you have said what was on your mind too and you decided not to. I don't have an answer to all the questions. But I have an answer to one.

Maybe the third time really is a charm. Or maybe I figured it out already and haven't caught on to it yet. Sometimes your spirit gains knowledge that cant be released cause your mind isn't mature enough to appreciate it. This my prayer:

Father God I come before you with a humble heart asking you to release this revelation unto me. I pray that I am mature enough to not just accept what I am about to receive but to also apply it effectively in my life. I thank you for never letting my prayers fall upon deaf ears and for always giving me answers. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

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