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Closed Doors

I think everybody has found themselves on the wrong side of the door. Either you wish you hadn't opened it or, in my case, you wish you could just close it. Usually I'm not one to dwell on either side but this situation is special. It took more than a twisting of the knob or a turning of the key. I opened a lot more than a door. And I'm wise enough to say I need to close it. But I'm honest enough to say I don't know how. 

And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. (Matthew 16:19 KJV)

Even the seasons prophesy. They have no known beginning or end. Sometimes that are skipped or extend but not once do they get offended. The glory of spring does not come at the expense of the exposure of winter. The harvest is consistent in increase but lacking in labor. The same is so of relationships. What starts off as friends can easily grow into lovers. But the second the friend is starved, the lover feels betrayed. Truth be told, love is not a feeling. When the soul stops feeling, the spirit can make a quality decision. 

Love does not close doors. 

Only sacrifice can do that. When you remember how much you had to give up  to move on, you lose the desire to go back. It's not that you don't love them, it's just that you can't afford to stay anymore. Behind the veil, there is a presence so sweet, but without a sacrifice we can't even smell it. I know the pain of letting go and the joy of hanging on. Endurance needs no altar. You cannot kill yourself and run at the same time. 

You need agreement to walk not run. 

Division is not just a strategy of the enemy. It is a technology of the Kingdom of God. Closing a door is not a matter of motion. It is a matter of skill and wisdom. You don't need to burn the bridge to discontinue use. You simply grow the fruit of discipline. 

It's okay to let go. 

I'm learning it's okay to walk away. Everybody is not worthy of an explanation. Sometimes silence is the knife in the back of a good friend you have to leave alone. I'm always ready to walk away. But it's the consistency of the left foot in front of the right keeps me coming back. It's not that my feet aren't moving, I'm just traveling in the wrong direction. 

I wish you the best where you are.

But just know the doorbell has been disconnected. 

Goodbye to the empty promises, almost falling in love, and pushing where I'm not wanted. 

Hello to filled vases, unfailing love, and acceptance of me. 

I wouldn't say it's over. But there are no more beginnings. Don't bother knocking on the door. Nobody is home to answer. 





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