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Shift My Life

[Verse 1]
You're everything i thought you never were and nothing like i thought you could have been.
but still you live inside of me. so tell me how is that. you're the only one i wish i could forget. the only one id love to not forgive. and though you break my heart you're the only one. and though there are times when i hate you cause i cant erase the times that you heart me and put tears on my face. and even now while i hate you it pains me to say i know ill be there at the end of the day.

[Chorus]
i don't want to be with out you babe i don't want a broken heart. don't want to take a breath without you baby i don't want to play that part i know that i love you but let me just say i don't want to love you in no kind of way no no i don't want a broken heart and i don't want to play the broken hearted girl

these two parts of the song describe my exact situation. its everything I'm going through right now. and bey, i couldn't say said it better my self. i didn't like this song at first but i must say i love it now. esp since i can relate to it. its crazy how situations can change yo taste in music. it might not be your favorite today but tomorrow when you going through it you will love it.

so back to my topic, verse one is for my ex. no i don't hate him. i love him way too much to ever hate him. but he did cause me a ton of pain. he took so much from him. i haven't been my complete self sense then. and the only person that can fill that void is my God. but after 2 years nothing has change cause i wont invite change in. its so much love there i just leave it. i want it back but i don't want it back. this situation can make or break the new stuff. as much as i don't want to letting go is my best option. but i need direction. i don't know how to do that. i see him and he still brings tons of joy and laughter in my life. we are very close cause we been through so much. i was there for him when he needed me. and i def know he will be there at the end of the day like i would also. if he needs me I'm there and that's dangerous for me. i left this relationship in the past but i never took my love inside of it with me. so I'm in stuck in past. i guess i always knew this day would come. but i march forward with half a heart.

now to the chorus. my baby. my other heart. my love. he has helped me through so much. when the old ended and i could stop crying he took me with him and we became us. now we are together and he gets a half for the price of a whole. i feel like staying my heart is already broke. but leaving i have to carry a broken heart. i would so much rather be alive with a heart that's broke then to keep moving with a broken heart. i feel like I'm in a lose lose situation. whether i leave or stay I'm still not whole. i still have so much damage here. and no guy wants a chick with damage extra baggage. so i write this.......

and even in the faded pictures of a past love i can see your face.
my heart pieces the missing pixels back together.
my love for you is crystal clear.
true love i mean real love or maybe God-like love has photographic memory.
so i can see your face on blank sheets of paper.
i color you in starting with the things i loved the most.
ill lightly sketch the things that broke my heart.
it should have been you and me. it was suppose to be me and you.
but that's not how my love story ended.
i cant erase you and write me back in.
now all Ive got are flashbacks and these photographs.
can you autograph my heart, cause when i die i want
our love to be worth billions.

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